Left, Right, Center: Worldviews and Friendship (or Marriage)


What an unlikely pairing: James Carville is Southern through and through, loud mouthed, abrasive, yet charming, and very very much a Democrat; Mary Matalin is from Chicago, low key, reserved, a bit cold seeming when compared to Carville’s bounding (some say grating) enthusiasm, and very very much a Republican. Carville is arrogant as is evidenced by the proclamation on the front page of his site: The man who has devised the most dramatic political victories of our generation, and he has. By contrast, Matalin’s site is muted and sophisticated, professional, and her experience and success speak for themselves, they don’t scream from the mouth of a caricature of her at a podium (as is the case with Carville). But this blog post isn’t about them, well, not at any rate about their bios or cv’s; rather, I’m interested in their being politically polar opposites, and really really opposite, neither is moderate or even near moderate, they are both far [insert direction for their respective parties]. These two outwardly opposite and apparently unsuited people have been married for almost fourteen years.

I’ve watched them on Crossfire or whatever else on Sundays or on this PBS show or that, and I’ve been hypnotized by their interaction. He is boisterous and opinionated, brilliant and funny, and she is calm and opinionated, brilliant and funny, but they say and firmly believe totally opposite things about the world, about politics, about the country, about . . . well, everything that most of us hold dear. So how on earth does that marriage work? It’s mind boggling to me, but it obviously does; apart from the bickering one can see a real affection between them, a bond that defies logic. And I find it beautiful.

Most of you know I’m a crusty old cynic, but that sort of peace between opposing sides is truly heartening. I’ve had several experiences here on 360 with people from political parties other than my own or who had views that were opposite my own, and I can only say that more often than not, I’ve been hugely disappointed that people can’t seem to be friends with people with whom they don’t agree about . . . the war, abortion, gay marriage, civil rights, and on. Me? I can think what I think and accept people who don’t agree; I may not accept what they say and might get ruffled at how they say it, but at the end of the day, it’s one tiny aspect of who we are as people. So what if I think we should either troop up and actually do whatever we need to do in Iraq or get out? So what if I think that gays should be allowed to marry or a woman or a black person can be president? So what if I’m a Christian who hasn’t been inside a church, except for funerals and weddings, in well over a decade? Does this mean we can’t be friends? For some, alas, it does.

So I ask you, my 360 friends, what do you think about befriending someone who doesn’t see the world as you do? What about marrying them? Do opposites attract, in terms of political leaning? Or is that a slow ticking bomb ready to explode? Can there be true friendship if the people involved view the world in significantly different terms? If you’re a democrat, could you love a republican or vice versa? If you firmly believe that gay people should be allowed to marry, could you marry someone who thought that an abomination? What about religious upbringing or background? Can very different religions mix in one friendship or household? I’m very curious to hear what goes on in all our minds on this; we’ve all seen friendships implode or explode here, after all.


Oh, and just so everyone knows: I’m not ignoring or belittling my many good friends who’ve remained my good friends despite their clearly wrong-headed views on some issues (ahem, Amber, in particular. Teehee).

28 thoughts on “Left, Right, Center: Worldviews and Friendship (or Marriage)

  1. I can think what I think and accept people who don’t agree; I may not accept what they say and might get ruffled at how they say it, but at the end of the day, it’s one tiny aspect of who we are as people.” Thats a crucial point Fuzzy, with that approach you won’t have many enemies like others, who are so Finicky about everything. In the end of the day, all they have those finicky things but lose everyone around them. Glad you are like that. Regarding relationships, my mom and dad are totally opposite, they had their differences, but mostly the adjusted to each other. They didn’t make a big deal. Heart doesn’t have politics, it just loves 🙂 thats all it does. If the couple adjusts to the differences and then just love, it will be bliss like Carville and Matalin. You can see how happy they are with the broad smile, that shows. Cheers 🙂

  2. It’s quite possible. Politics is a temporary, passing thing, but the woman or man next to you, the father or mother of your children, is much more stable and permanent. All the political hysteria, hype and hot air of today as regards certain politicians etc will vanish in a few years or sometimes less.

    A much tougher case is religion and ethnicity, which can make the possibilites quite fragile, but even there it can be worked out.

    That being said- a union of Rosie O’Donnel and Rush Limbaugh sounds intriguing.. 🙂

  3. Hi Fuzzy,
    I have all my life long befriended many people from all sorts of different walks of life, and as long as they don’t try to change or ‘rescue’ me {cough}, we can learn something about each other. Mind you, with many of these friends I would have to pick and choose which dinner invitations would go well with other friends because I wouldn’t want anyone else feeling out of their comfort zone {ie, no Wiccan biker acquaintances with any of my Anglican church friends}.

    As far as dating or marrying them, no. I’m quite anal about having the person I share my life with also fall in line with my particular values. I’ve tried dating {and nearly marrying} someone who was so opposite to me in my beliefs but I ended that five year relationship just in time, feeling I had a narrow escape. Conversely, Jamie and I were very much alike in our beliefs except for two important aspects that ended up shattering the marriage as well as my heart, and as life goes on for me at age 48, I will not settle for someone who can’t fit that particular bill. @@ hugs, G. xo

  4. Oh My! Fuzzi I think you ought to get some response this time. I believe when Rosie gets done with Rush she’ll marry Donald Trump so that we don’t have to hear about them again.
    The trick is I think that one must separate those thingss that are temporary in life from those things that are permanent. aka chris v. If your personality demands that evrything must be your way then a conflicting relationship will never work unless the other person is totally submisive. Dissimilar personalities can be a plus to a relationship because there is always something new to talk about. All permanent relationships will have some give and take because nothing but love is forever. ……….. oups my spring broke….

  5. Yet another thought provoking post Fuzzy. In my life, I have learned that it takes way too much energy and decision making to keep my own thoughts and beliefs in line. That leaves me with little time, energy, or, for that matter, desire to change any one else beliefs. Politics are so fickle anymore, that half the politicians aren’t really sure which party they belong to any more, and their voting record shows it. As far as religion, if you are lucky enough to find a God of your understanding, or no God, what business is that of mine. Then there is the sexual preferance question. I answer that like this. A persons sexual preferance only matters to me if I intend on going to bed with that person. The only question I have is the one of gay marriage, and not whether it is moral, right, or siciably acceptable. That question isn’t for me to answer. My stumbling block there involves rights and benifits that are entitled to married couples. Are gay married couples infringing on those rights and benifits? I don’t know.

  6. Fuzz – I have seen these two on various shows and I am so glad you brought them up. I have admired them myself. How different they can be, but still be able to hold it together and love each other so much. If I recall a statement from him (not his exact words, mind you, but something along the lines) that “they know what they can and cannot talk about.” And they really seem to respect one another. It’s quite beautiful.

    I do consider myself to be a rather open and non-judgemental person. I do like to hear other’s opinions, especially if they differ from mine. More often than not, they teach me, or make me see a side of the situation that I may not have considered, or even confirm my beliefs further!!

    Some people can certainly be testy, and I have run into them on here: there was a particular young woman on here who I found to be very interesting. She blogged mostly about her feelings, and it was interesting to me to see that sometimes she felt the same way I did (makes you think you aren’t crazy, at least!) But one comment I made differed with hers and I was immediately banished from her page forthwith! I guess I feel that if you are on here opening yourself up to the public, you gotta be open to differing opinions.

    Personally, I feel people’s differences are what makes this world so interesting!

  7. The only word I haven’t heard yet is COMPROMISE – this is what all truly good relationships (of all kinds) are built upon…I have been married for nearly 15 yrs to a man from the other side of the world to that which I grew up on, he grew up on ACDC, Australian Crawl, Kiss…me I grew up with Elton John singing disco ditties in the background (well so to speak – should mention Wham! Tears For Fears – the pop culture), I come from an upper middle class British conservative home where-as he comes from an Australian laid back background where he was allowed to take mornings off school to go surfing (I had to have a temperature and hardly be able to walk before I could get a look in on a day off). My families politics were Conservative, his Labour. When we met the beauty of our relationship was that we let each other be ourselves – warts ‘n’ all is what I call it. Over the years there are MANY MANY things that we have found ourselves on opposing sides of the fence to each other but we survive because we compromise – after all what he does are his choices and what I do are mine – I went through a long phase of not doing the things I like because of his opinions on them and d’you know what I felt dominated and controlled but it was ME who was not living my truth – he was just voicing his opinion – so now I do whatever I please so long as it doesn’t really upset him (but to tell you the truth I would still stand by my guns even if he didn’t like it) and he, he does what he likes…the key is communication..and I still don’t believe his left wing politics!!!! LOL….that was a bit of a ramble – hope you got what I mean…

  8. umm that LOL was actually only an L1!!! And the other thing that I wanted to say was that when you have chemistry with a person or even a feeling of destiny then any and all differences are no longer seen as obstacles. Personally I don’t know why people get so upset with gay marriages, religious issues, maoral stand points, political issues…..if we all spent our time worrying about our own energy, being the best person that we can possibly be, doing the right thing according to our own structures then we would all be a lot happier – a light can only come from within when the windows are clean and someone remembers to turn the light on!!!

  9. What nobody knows is how these two are with each other behind closed doors. They apparently keep their private life just that: private. But I’m guessing this is where their secret to successful marriage would reveal itself.

    For me, acceptance of those who are different from me requires spaciousness. Do I have room in my psyche to see a variety of points of view as holding validity, even if they do not agree with my own? I practice daily to cultivate such spaciousness. Others might not have it, but that’s their thing. I can still find someone acceptable who doesn’t have any room for me within their reality.

    Frankly, as you know from reading my most recent post, I actually ENJOY differing points of view. I used to ask my ex-husband to argue with me, just for fun! Do you think Carville and Matalin get turned on by such things? *giggles*

  10. For me, my llama mate is on the same page in philosophies. My beliefs are too strong to have someone constantly chipping away at things that mean so much to me. Couldn’t be with a big game hunter…ever! Just fact. Couldn’t be with a heartless b*stard, ever. But friends are many colors and styles – the more the merrier. Love the two-leggers and the four leggers, as friends. Even care about friends that don’t like my art! (grin) Viva La Difference!

  11. I like to think of myself as “open” to other peoples lifestyles…to each their own, but I have been in relationship where we have had opposing opinions and it caused major conflict, like racism. I think it takes two people to compromise or one like Ed says, one dominate and one submissive for it to work. I know longer have the tolerance to deal with anyone hardheaded so if they aren’t tolerant of other people, I don’t have anything to do with them. Hope this makes sense this morning.

  12. Chris, that’s so beautiful and so true! The heart doesn’t know politics and if people are willing to adjust to one another, no reason it couldn’t work out. :)) I just love the way that you think? Thanks for the great comments, too.

    Hi Sgt, nice to see you! 🙂 Yes, religion and ethnicity would be more problematic, I see that. I guess it depends on how religious each person is; obviously a fundamentalist Christian would have a hard time with . . . well, anyone, really, even a Christian who wasn’t fundamentalist! Hmmm. Food for thought. And Rosie and Rush? Very strange bedfellows indeed, guess Ann Coulter would look better to Rosie, being a girl and all, but still . . . don’t see that working, either. :))

    Hi Gloria (jumping up and down and waving madly at GG) Just pausing to ponder the Wiccan bikers and the Laura Ashley crowd . . . teehee. I can definitely see what you are saying here, and all the books and experts agree that matching backgrounds, beliefs, and values are key to a successful relationship. Maybe. I couldn’t testify to that as being single none of my relationships has worked out, those with carbon copies of me (yikes! what a thought!) nor those with opposites. I guess the thinking is that relationships are hard enough to sustain without throwing in bones of contention all over the place. I really don’t know. I guess it’s about hearts and love as Chris says because one couple may split over something another couple might think a bump in the road. Love hearing from you, Gloria :))

    Hey Heyman (hehe, I just never get tired of saying that). So you’re touching on compromise, too, that sense of give and take that Chris talks about. Yes, I definitely think that’s important, and I think, too, that it is harder for those people who can’t conceive of any other way of being, thinking, etc. to accept and love someone who DOES think differently. Makes sense. :)) Thanks for your fab comment.

    Hey Michael, and thanks for your comments, too! I just love how everyone is really giving this some thoughts. I do have a quick question, though, what do you mean that gay couple may be infringing on rights and benefits? What rights and benefits and why wouldn’t gay people be entitled to the same benefits as straight people? Just curious as I’ve never really understood this line of thinking (I did blog on this once, and someone said the same thing but never explained what they meant). Huggs to you!!

    Yes, Wendy, I do think that mutual respect is key to maintaining a relationship between opposites, well, really between anyone! Sorry to hear about your banishment for daring to disagree, that sucks, but has happened to me, too. I get more frustrated when someone disagrees with one idea or post and then just won’t read/respond to others on other topics, just seems petty to me. But that’s part of what I meant by saying that our politics or whatever else is just a small portion of who we are. When someone asks about me, I don’t go, “I’m Fuzzy, and I’m a [insert political party]” Hell, that might not come up . . . ever in some friendships. Shrug, it happens. Don’t let it get to you. :))

    Ooooh, Ali, your relationship sounds so romantic and heavenly, too. Imagine being able to really be yourself (pauses to imagine), how grand that sounds! One day I hope to find that, too. :)) And what I love about you, is that you understand how rare and valuable that is. Yay you!! And I like your added comment, too, about worrying about ourselves and being the best we can be. Then we’d have no time to worry about what someone else thought and if we “approved” or not! :)) Thanks for the fab and thoughtful and thought provoking comments.

  13. Jillene, I love this idea of spaciousness that you explain here. It makes complete sense because it’s dependent on both parties in a way. Sometimes, I think it’s healthy to argue and clear the air, and I get very frustrated with internalizers who usually end up being backstabby in a passive aggressive kind of way that they pat themselves on the back for thinking they’re so clever and “soft hearted.” Ugh. Anyway, we’re obviously very similar in these regards, and yes, I imagine that these two have some pretty hot “make up” sex or just pretty hot sex in general . . . all that passion, right? 😉

    Aw, Gaby, what a lovely open view you have! I knew there was something I liked about your sweet llama self. :)) And yes, I can see how it’d be trying to be with someone who forced their views on you, but what if it were someone like Ali describes, who just believes what they do and isn’t interested in converting you or the world? That sort of confident, serene belief that doesn’t need to be jammed down someone else’s throat? I don’t know if it’d work, but I sure am loving all this discussion of it! Thanks for you fab and fun comments. Love the two and four legged thing :))

    Makes perfect sense, Pris! And you and Gaby are getting me to thinking about how people ARE with their views and how that must make a difference to being able to be friends or lovers or spouses. As Jillene says, we don’t know what goes on behind closed doors with these two; maybe they don’t discuss politics at all or don’t try to force compliance from the other. I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t accept that I might have different views, beliefs, feelings; someone trying to make me over in their ideological image would have a very tough row to hoe, that’s for sure. Actually, they wouldn’t, I’d toss them and their gardening implements right out the door. hehe. Okay, I’m done with that metaphor. Thanks Pris :))

    Thanks for stopping by, Azad, and for leaving a note so that I know you were here. 😀 huggs to you.

    Thank you ALL for your wonderful comments! As always, I’m humbled by how intelligent and sensitive and just plain wonderful you all are. Huggs all ’round. xx

  14. Hmm…that’s a tricky one. If I felt that someone was really bigoted, then I know I couldn’t be with them. I like open-minded people. However, if it was just that someone had a difference of opinion to me, but was willing to look at other beliefs than their own, then yes, I could deal.
    I sometimes like a bit of a clash…liking and agreeing on all the same things can make for quite a tame relationship…debate can be fun!

  15. I’ve heard both the opinionated Mary and the opinionated James discussing this weird pairing. He said: “I don’t talk about her “crowd” with her…and she knows how I feel. I know how she feels. Case closed.” She says: “…he’ll come around”.

    That would be too hard to deal with for me with a mate…knowing how STRONGLY these two both feel about SO many things. Ideological foes. They must have a strong physical connection…(ew…didn’t want to picture that with these two!)

  16. I am a firm believer in friendship! Call me an ignorant optimist, but I think more can be done out of friendship and understanding rather than taking sides.

    I am all about finding compromise, but that does not mean one person should give up his/her beliefs in favor of keeping with the majority. Not everyone is going to agree on all points, but that does not make the opposite view less important. I would be afraid if all people agreed on all points at all times; humanity would cease to be unique and creative. Conflicts will emerge, and how we handle these conflicts reveal what is important to us and what kind of people we really are.

  17. OMG, Tally, you just put in one paragraph everything I wanted to put in that whole long blog post; how do you do it? That’s it exactly; not to be with someone who is bigoted and pushy about their beliefs but is openminded enough to keep things interesting but not boring. Yay you!! :))

    Oh, I don’t know, Gaby, I think that a bit of difference can be fun, keeps things from being “yes, dear” all the time, you know? Even though, as others have pointed out, compromise, respect, and open-mindedness would all have a part to play in making something like that work. Thanks for stopping back in, it’s a fun discussion, huh? :))

    Hey Ceres, good to see you, dear; how’re things with classes? (I ask this like I don’t know you’re getting straight A’s and impressing all your professors, especially a certain one, eh?) And as usual, you add a nice balanced take on this, yes, it IS how we handle conflict that matters, and this is always the case, whether we are with people who are “like” us or not. Excellent point, well stated. Huggs to you!! :))

  18. Wow this is turning into a great debate….I love your pages Fuzz…everyone joins in don’t they!!
    I have to agree that it would be really hard to be with someone who was bigotted or racist or any other undesirable defect…but generally we people are drawn towards people who have traits that we like and not towards the ones we find “uglY” so I guess I didn’t really think about it in that way – I mean I could never be with a big game hunter either Gaby…or an ex sex offender…or a complete bastard….or…or…or…I wonder what it would be like to be in a “yes dear” relationship….do you think you would get totally bored of always getting your own way or would it just be FANTASTIC….and truly is there such a thing? I don’t think I would even be attracted to a person who let me get my own way all the time….

  19. As for love. Ohhh opposites attract like hell. It makes it all so interesting. The perfect word I’m looking for is they COMPLIMENT each other. One has got what the other is missing and vice versa. It also makes life interesting. One gets to play in the mud pool of the other and experience something different!

    As for disagreeing. I already wrote a blog on ”Agree to disagree” But it was more of a rambling (that I needed as I was down with the damn flu) than touching hardcore issues. I personally have been bitterly opposed to other views most of my life. I could just shoot people dead for not agreeing with me. lol! 😉 But I have come to respect diversity of opinion very much in the last 5 years or so. Friends must not ruin friendship over politics or opinions. But sadly.. it does happen.

    But anyway, social patterns are formed on similar opinions and world views. Go to any place… schools, workplaces or whatever. You will see people divided in chunks. Because they like to talk to each other in a way that affirms and soothes their own world view/ interests/hobbies. In other words they are trying to become more and more of what they already are. They wallow in their comfort zone. It’s so boring it makes me puke.

    I, by the way, am in the business of annoying people everywhere. I preach morality to freethinkers and liberalism to religionists. Personally, I respect both on random levels.

  20. Doggone you fuzzy girl, making me think again. Well, here I go about who i choose to talk with and be friends with and or marry. I didnt even think about this stuff when I got married. But as it turns out, John and I think along the same lines, although he is a bit more to the right than me. I dont have a problem being friends with people that think differently than I do. How boring would that be, and who could I possibly argue with. One of my best friends who is on the same political level than me, we argue regularly. but we are still friends. This topic is something that again makes us stop and think about who our friends are, and why they are. I dont call a lot of people friends, they are mostly aquaintenses. but I still enjoy a good conversation with most people.

  21. Hey Ali, and yes, this is loads of fun; I love it when everyone chips in with their ideas and thoughts, keeps life interesting. And that’s the same theme as the relationship thing, I think; I like things to be interesting, not drama I’m on Jerry Springer interesting, but something to talk about without just nodding and going, “yeah, yeah, I agree” or “uh-huh, you’re preaching to the choir over here.” But that’s me (and you). Others probably like much more peaceful existences, you know? And yeah, I’d not thought about someone who was a criminal or clubbed baby seals for fun; I was thinking of someone that I would find attractive and desirable in the first place but who just happened to be an atheist (or something else that I could live with). Thanks for stopping back in, always love hearing from you! :))

    Eskimo, you crack me up, but you also manage to include really insightful comments with your humor; that’s what makes you such a great addition here. Wallowing in one’s comfort zone can be pretty boring and puke-worthy, I agree, but I have to admit that I do it quite a bit. I guess that’s why this opposites thing appeals because it’s me poking a baby toe out there into the wide world . . . well, that’s a bit dramatic and hyperbolic, but it IS fun to talk to people who are different than us in all sorts of ways. Thanks for your comments! :))

    Aw, Lisa, sorry to make you think, TME lmao You are too funny. I’m like you and don’t really have a lot people in my real life that I consider “friends” (that word bearing a bit of weight in my mind), but I do have a good mix of views and opinions among my friends, too. Hard to imagine John’s more to the right of you, though, as you seem pretty far right on some things (like me on the war and crime and stuff like that, I mean). Huggs to you and so happy you stopped by! :))

  22. Hi 🙂

    I’m going in ‘blind’ here and haven’t read any responses (will go back and read after.)

    I made it a major part of my life to befriend those who differ from me (early decision, I was 14 years old and a long story.) Life is a balance; that’s how I would say I see it. And I am a part of that balance; if I think I am or not doesn’t make any difference because ‘here I am’ and whilst I am here then I *must* have some sway on people around me purely by existing. I subscribe heavily to the Butterfly Effect (another long story … gosh my life is *full* of long stories!) and whatever I do today will affect someone; vice versa, the issue being if for good or for bad and to what extent. That is *my* choice.

    Life is one melting-pot, we all live on the one world, and we all view the one sun and moon and breathe the air which is born of Mother Nature and her root-crops which help sustain us. The song ‘Brothers in Arms’ is fitting to today’s world climate and the line: “We all live in one world, but we live in different ones’ rings-true; I see no contradiction here but rather a reality which sometimes falls into irony

    Love is a huge word by definition. I am no Practicing Christian but I do see Wisdom in some of what it says that I know of: ‘Love your neighbour as yourself’ is something we could all live by and it would make the world a better place; not surprisingly no one has to be a Christian to live this way, it’s simply a conscious choice and the ability to chose as we will. Wisdom can be found in many places other than the Bible of course.

    But for me the greatest irony of all is what we do in putting to rights where we see an issue to be wrong en-mass. There is nothing wrong with that and in doing so we seek to be noble; but often there are ongoing fights behind our own closed doors (literally) and also from the moment we step outside. It could be said that we each, and individually, put our own house in order before telling others in what they should do … I see a lot of sense in that. Putting it into working practice? Ah … if only life was that simple

    Interesting blog.

  23. This is fascinating, Frankie, as are all your comments. And it’s really amazing how many times in the past four or so days, I’ve heard mention of the Butterfly Effect in one form or another; wonder if that’s significant? Musing here, not really asking. Well, okay, maybe I am. :)) And I very much agree with you on your last point . . . it’s so easy to preach to people about getting and keeping our own house in order and not worrying about or judging others, but putting that into practice? Not so simple! I’ve seen people claim to that philosophy only to pop up now and again berating others for not doing so . . . ummmmm, how does that work again?? But I think it’s the goodest intention and so admire anyone for thinking/feeling that way, if only briefly or before a serious lapse. Better to try than not, right? :)) Huggs to you, dear xx

  24. I really like this Blog Fuzz.. I have often wondered about the unlikely couple myself.
    But all that aside, they both have one quality that stands out… devotion.
    Though they may not agree in politic, they are devoted to each other.

  25. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL….my wrong-headed views….LOLOLOLOL…I bet I can guess which ones they are and all! lOLOLOLOL….

    So here goes….I am a white, very strong and centered southern baptist from Maine. I don’t know if I am republican or a democrat. Never really gave it much thought…LOLOLOLOLOL…NOT!!!! I am a democrat all the way baby!!!! I think I am almost a white supremist who is tired to death of racial whining and says roll on gay marriages and no women in the White House, they already have Harvard!

    I pretty much am different to everyone I meet but they are my views and I don’t plan on changing them for anyone.

    My husband and I are as different as night and day on almost every issue under the sun. It makes for lively discussions when the news is on. My husband feels the government have too much power and I tell him to be thankful he doesn’t live in Iraq..and so on and so on…the biggest difference in our marriage is our relationship with God. He gave up on God when his mother died when he was very young and I love God so much I shout about him from the roof tops(something folk here in England are not comfortable with!)

    So we have politics and religon differences against us but we still flurish and it doesn’t effect or relationship!

  26. I agree, River, they really are devoted to one another, and I so admire that (and secretly covet it, too!). :))

    Thanks for sharing, Amber; your relationship gives me hope. Finding anyone that agrees with MY political stuff will be hard enough, add to that my spiritual stuff, and omg! I’d never find love. :)) Thanks for your fab and thoughtful comments, BBB :))

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