Yet More Leno Headlines: Rhymeless and Reasonless

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There are at least ten different places to “compose blog entry,” but I always go through the most time consuming click-combination possible . . . I just keep doing it the way I first did it and never try anything new. Unfortunately this applies to a lot of my steps and missteps in life and in blogging and may even explain why I’m doing yet another Leno’s Headlines thing. They amuse me. They amuse my good friend Lisa. And they amuse some of you (or so you tell me). So I’m picking out headlines, saying something sarcastic/cynical/silly about them and then letting you take a look at the headline, too. Just like always. Hope you like it . . . again.

Some of us are frustrated with our politicians, wondering why they seem to think that the same rules and laws that apply to ordinary folk just don’t apply to them . . . .

Um, maybe because they don’t?

And fat cats at these big corporations are no better, right? I mean . . .

lay off 74 workers . . . well, maybe the company is floundering, it can’t be helped, they’re broke. Or let’s read the next piece of business news . . .

Oh! Well, thank God that Johnston will be doubling his salary now that the “loss” has been narrowed (by all those layoffs? hmmmm). Okay, that wasn’t funny.

But check out this one . . .

Now that’s a guy you WANT singing at your party; he even uses his (drum roll, please) mouth to sing!

Sometimes I’m just embarrassed, really I am, by the irony of ignorance:

“Are” country? Speak English? Please don’t hold up signs declaring your love of the language until you’ve had them proofread by someone who speaks it. Ugh.

Math, as you know, is not my forte, but . . .

even I can work out that 30 doesn’t go into 100 four times! And this is the American Bankers Association Education Foundation? Rolling eyes, sighing, and feeling just a teensy bit sick to my stomach on that one.

Okay, now this is the beginning of a beautiful . . .

. . . expensive, rancorous, drawn out, hate-ridden divorce. Don’t ya think?

And now for something actually funny:

And this one just slays me . . . gotta love a punny ad:

And you have to wonder if they meant it to be punny.

You know how much I love it when the caption just does not go with the photo:

According to whom? All the little fishies?

And this one, I roared over . . .

Oh, wait, the roaring wasn’t me; it was the fire moving in on this home. No wonder the owners are “very motivated” to sell: it certainly won’t “last long.”

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16 thoughts on “Yet More Leno Headlines: Rhymeless and Reasonless

  1. lol.. this is quite a roundup. You definitely would be banished from our nation’s capital for thinking too much, or at the very least, like Dick Cheney after 9/11, confined to an undisclosed location.. 🙂

  2. *rolling eyes*

    *same queasy feeling over poor math and language skills exhibited*

    *roaring laughter*

    Lovely Monday morning exercise in catching up on ‘the news.’ Good reminder why I avoid newspapers like the plague. They are one!

  3. LOL — Needed that this day! I love them and hope that you never stop doing them. The fire in the background of the house was almost like candlelight…sets the mood, don’t cha think? LOL
    Hugs Fuzzy.

  4. Hei Fuzz.

    Great vintage-Fuzz, as always.
    Brilliantly funny and such clever comments by your sound as a bell-self.
    Take care and do keep well. Rii xx

  5. All are LOL worthy, cool, the theft occurred between November and Tuesday, takes the top prize. Lovely, sadly I don’t watch Leno show, so keep doing this, it is real funny. 🙂

  6. lol, Sarge, funny!

    And here I’ve been avoiding newspapers because they make my fingers all black and smurchy; yours is a much better reason, Jillene. :))

    Well, you ARE smart, Kerry, but I so know what you mean 😉

    Teehee, Gaby, yes, that romantic glow puts you right in the mood to buy the house that’s soon to be ashes. 😀 LOL Huggs to you on this day that you need a laugh, you prolly need a big warm fuzzy hug, too! :))

    Aw, thanks, Rii, you know I appreciate your encouragement and support! Honest to goodness huggs to your most dignified and talented self xx

    Oh my! Chris that’s my absolute fave, too. Between November and Tuesday . . . just that much makes me laugh. :)) (shhh . . . I don’t watch Leno, either, I get these online from the link I’ve linked above)

    Thanks for all your fabu comments; huggs to each and every!

  7. Oh my god some of these are just so funny. The house with the rouring fire behind it is lovely but the fire does somewhat put you off parting with all your hard earned cash to buy what looks like a mostly wooden house when thats behind it!

    I loved the congratulations message as well. Had to read that twice though, but a good way to get your own back if he cheated on her. Revenge is best served cold after all and I don’t think you can get colder than that now can you!

    Big hugs to you and the crew xxxx

  8. Lovely Fuzzy…how on earth do you find the time to read all the papers let alone highlight, cut-out, scan, blog….I know…you’re one of those over active ADD types who nly stops when she goes to sleep – yay for you!!! Love it! The congrats message was my favourite…just because!!! And the sandbag success…now that is funny!! Sorry nothing amusing to add today…I am feeling particularly flat on this 42 degree Tuesday (or is it still November I ask?)….wiggling back at ya in the fave new friend dance…Ali xx

  9. I, too, needed the laughs! Thanks….And how DO YOU FIND the time? Between studying and work and new job hunting I am exhausted…..good for you! K

  10. Thankds for posting these. I wait for them. I really do. I wonder if the seller will make a dael on that house. Maybe Amber can retire here early.

  11. I read that one twice, too, Snuggles, but oooh, it’s a good ‘un, huh? Wouldn’t mind knowing how that one turned out (I’m SUCH a superficial gossip!) Huggs. :))

    lmao Ali, love that November and Tuesday thing. And I don’t actually find these (though I could pretend that I’m that fabulous), Jay Leno has a show and he has the viewers send all these in; I just copy and paste ’em from his website. It’s linked above if you want to check it out. Glad you enjoy them, though, some of them make me laugh until tears come rolling down my face (some are too rude to paste here; those are the funny ones, too) Loving the new friend dance! Huggs :))

    Hey, Kate, well, as I just told Ali, I don’t do these per se. But I do understand about time constraints and other obligations (unfortunately I have zero will power and usually end up blogging instead of anything else I need to do. Addicted, I think.) Huggs :))

    A veg, Heyman, too funny!! Thanks for the fab compliments! Huggs :))

    Yay, Tally! Thanks Huggs :))

    teehee, Amber, yeah, that one had me, too. Funny how even if it were right, charity would get only 10 cents. Huggs :))

    So glad you thought they were funny, Bert, since I love your sense of humor that means a lot! Huggs :))

    Thanks, Lisa, I do these for you, you know, so you better love ’em. lmao Huggs :))

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