Shoot the Person Who Coined the Phrase "Forty and Fabulous"

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Okay, so I’m not usually a big fan of that tag thing–though I may have to revise that theory because I really do a lot of them these days; either tags are getting better, or I’m going soft in my old age. Anyway, Ali just posted a fun tag that consists of seven (7) things about herself that no one knows or that are odd or random. Well, I’ve been enjoying Tally‘s lists of random things about herself at the end of a couple of her recent posts, so I thought why not? Why not, indeed, it turns out that I blog a lot of random and odd things about myself so coming up with this list was no easy task; it also turns out that I got a bit carried away with number one (1). Um, never got past it, actually, in more ways than one.

1. I hate hate hate being forty. Forty sucks. It’s not thirty-something anymore, and seems old, even to me. But I still feel about twenty-six (and yes, yes, okay I act like I’m about twenty-six, too. Or twelve. Depending on the day of the week.). And being forty means that my face has suddenly become a road map of crow’s feet and “smile lines” (what a ridiculous name for icky lines around your mouth!), and that I can’t smooth on enough lotion or make up to hide them. Sleep has never been more important to my “look,” because losing even one hour’s sleep shows towards the end of the day, and I look haggard and haggy. Did I mention that forty sucks?

Oh, and forget about dating . . . all the straight single (or divorced) men are . . . well, let’s face it, rejects that no one else wanted. (Oops, I feel a rant coming on.) Stunted emotionally or crazily immature (i.e. living with their parents or in some dingy I still think I’m in college hole in the wall), the worst of them have never been married. These ones still party like it’s 1999, and they leave their studly boxes o’ condoms lying around for anyone to see. They eat a lot of pizza. And they do their clothes at the Laundorama. They tend to date younger than themselves, girls in their late teens, early twenties. Which is fine because no grown up woman would look twice. The previously marrieds are better bets, sure, but where are they? Working their butts off 24/7 to pay child support and alimony, no time for Fuzzy. Forty sucks.

I saw a snippet of a stand-up comic’s routine the other day on the Comedy Channel, and can I just say that humor is indeed the way we talk about our biggest fears and worst mistakes. She was very pretty and very funny, and she was talking about how in her twenties she’d gone through men “like kleenex”: this one’s too tall, this one’s too nice, this one eats funny, this one doesn’t tuck in his shirt, this one wears baseball caps, etc. You get the point. And the thing is I totally identify with that. Sad, but true. I was a picky picky girl, and I was having the time of life (if only I’d known that then). The next part of this comic’s (didn’t catch her name, was just flipping around through channels) routine was about how all that changed in her thirties . . . now there are no good men left, they’ve all been snapped up, and that guy who didn’t tuck in his shirt looks so good mowing the grass in suburbia. And she talked about how she rifles through the metaphorical trash looking for that disposable kleenex guy who was too nice or that guy who liked her too much. Okay, it was funny as hell. And it really hit home. Sigh.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ll take being forty over the alternative, and I’m fortunate enough not to “need” a man financially, so it’s not the end of the world if I never find the right guy, but . . . well, it’s just all different now. I need to reset my mindset and get all positive, reinflate the self-esteem, that sort of thing. I think that would make me feel less . . . forty.

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After chatting with a friend just now, I decided to post a pic of the “wrinkled face of forty”; I put my blog on friends only while this is up and trust that no one will pass it along. Like yeah, what for, right?

[snip]

No idea why I’m munching on my hair. Must have run out of snacks.

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49 thoughts on “Shoot the Person Who Coined the Phrase "Forty and Fabulous"

  1. I panicked at 25, I’ll be panicking at 30, I’ll be a nervous wreck at 40, I’m sure. I’m already scrunching my face up in the mirror and looking for signs of aging…you may scoff but I bet you did it too. I laugh a lot, so the crows feet are a-coming. I also frown a lot, so the forehead lines are there too.
    In some ways though, I just don’t mind. I feel 18 inside, and that’s where it counts. I’m a big kid. And I know you are too 😀
    And I think it shines through.
    In all honesty, when I saw your pics, I wouldn’t have put you anywhere near 40. You’re very youthful, in face and most definitely in soul 😀
    Hugggggs to you, most wonderful TFT.

  2. i love how you said, “But I still feel about twenty-six (and yes, yes, okay I act like I’m about twenty-six, too. Or twelve. Depending on the day of the week.)” last year sometime i took oneo of those quiz things that was supposed to tell you your age. i’m pretty sure it said i was 12. no wonder we get along so well! 🙂

    now that i’m 35 and have two kids, the aging thing is really taking hold on my face. i am noticing all kinds of wrinkles. fuzzy, i’m not getting carded anymore when i order a drink out! i never really cared that much about aging. i don’t care that i’m getting gray hair and whatnot, but the wrinkles i’m not so keen on. the wrinkles were something i didn’t expect to happen so soon. i’m going to look 80, i think, by the time the boys graduate from high school.

    *hugs*

  3. Tally, I had a hard time at 25, too (my mom thought it would be funny to point out that I was quarter of a century old; I wanted to crawl in a hole and die), but I made it through. You’re so cute about scrunching your face up in the mirror, I do that, too, that’s how I can see all the horrors and ravages of age (it’s not really that bad if I never move my facial muscles! hehe). And no more frowning for you, Girly, only happy days and good thoughts ahead! I hope and wish that for you, anyway. I know what you mean about feeling young inside and having a youthful outlook/soul; you do and are, and I guess I do, too. Yay!! Huggs to YOU, most wonderfullest TFT!

  4. I am so with you on the 12 thing, Kerry! LOL, I think I took that same test with the same results, actually, as well. And yes, wrinkles are a HUGE shock, I mean we all “know” it’s going to happen, but then when it does and to US, it’s ICK! How is possible? And please, pass me that jar of expensive anti-aging cream. I’m sure you look amazing (I hear it on good authority from your hubby that you DO), so no worries about that. *hugs*

  5. Well, PAL, thanks a ton for calling me a REJECT. lol No, actually, it sounded horribly funny. Truth tickles.

    I do accept that getting old-physically- is a crisis time for women who are not mentally prepared for it. Looks are important for women. Men too are shallow I suppose. I personally always found women in their 30s and 40s much more attractive as they are mature, seasoned and thoughtful. But I guess many men don’t want these mature qualities in a woman, which is sad huh? I find many young girls irritating. Maybe that’s why I haven’t read Lolita so far. lol.

    Once people are past their 30 and 40 they get depressed and long for the youthful days. It is a little acknowledged fact that teens and early 20s are hardly easy years. Depression, gloom, identity crisis, heart breaks, quarter life crisis, ANGST, meaninglessness loom large over this young group. I have personally seen many friends going through nervous breakdowns through these years.

    In New Zealand suicide rate among teenagers is the highest in the developed world which so shocked me for two reasons: 1.) New Zealand is such an amazingly beautiful, peaceful country. It’s no Afghanistan or Ukraine. 2.) Why in the hell’s name so many young people would want to commit suicide? But apparently they have their reasons.

    I think life would become easier if we look at the bigger picture, don’t compare ourselves with others too much (biggest cause of sadness) and just let it happen and take comfort in the fact that we’ve made so far and nothing can change those good years we’ve already lived!

  6. You’re still in your twenties, Elmo, so you haven’t reached “reject” age. LOL. Actually, it was just a joke, anyway; it tickled me to write that (guess I lash out because I’m so bitter. And forty. Baahaahaa) I think that though our society is slowly changing and more pressure is being put on men to stay youthful, it’s still commonly accepted that women get OLD, while men become distinguished. Blech. And yeah, there’s something to that mid-life crisis thing, too. Heck, just the other day I was thinking about going clubbin’ after picking up a nice boy toy (NOT!). That’s more a man’s thing, maybe? I’ve seen footage of New Zealand (in Making of the Lord of the Rings), and it’s breathtakingly gorgeous! Those stats are scary, though. Sad. Big picture is definitely best, but not always easy when it comes to aging. For me, anyway. Today. Thanks for your ever-wonderful comments! 😀

  7. Cheers Mademoiselle.

    I think we’re all from space and we have a mission. Mine right now is to finish this coffee and make another one. 😉 That being distinguished bit is SOO true. All these tycoons and Senators are well, OLD. I cannot imagine any Abraham Lincoln, Bill Clinton, Rupert Murdoch or Donald Trump in his 20s. That would be like… illegal. lol

    Women rock too. You will. Actually you already do. Yay!!

  8. i think hubby still has the gooey love-struck glasses on. i’m much more realistic when i look in the mirror. of course, i’m also my biggest critic. honestly, i try not to worry about it too much. but that isn’t to say that i won’t be going in for thermal lifts at some point. i’m entirely too vain to completely age gracefully.

  9. Fuzzy I must say I think you are one hot mama at 40 . .would have never thought you were even close as a matter of fact when I went to do the scrunchy thing in the mirror I think I look older than you. Having been divorced now for almost three years I have been through the dating thing for the second go round. I had to laugh quite a bit although I never got to do the tissue thing. I must admit that I think the one I have found I could have pointed out many things about him when I first found him that would have made me roll my eyes. The couple that introduced us looked at me and said “He will need some training but we think you can do it.” I thought about that for a moment and decided I had trained one and I wasn’t going to do that again. I decided that I must be more open and just hang on for the ride as some would say and see how it goes. Chris is about 4 years younger than me and he was living the bachelor life. The first time I saw his condo I thought omg he’s like my kids. In dating almost a year now he has made his own changes and is becoming more adult. His townhouse is clean top to bottom. He actually cares if his clothes are wrinkled and dirty. He is learning to cook. I didn’t tell him to do any of this because I decided that if he really wanted to he would decide on his own or I would have to decide if I could live with his ways or if I needed to move on. He is a true geek. My ex-husband was the manly man hunting, fishing and just a jerk. Chris is sweet, thoughtful and likes things like Dancing with the Stars. He also loves sports. I guess what I am saying with all of this is that you need to look at a broader picture and see if you see someone you may have over looked because you thought they may not fit your image of what you are looking for. Heck throw on some of those spunky heels when you are recovered and get back out there in that great baseball game of life. As long as you feel younger than what you are continue to enjoy the game and find the one who thinks you hung the moon.

  10. Hi Fuzzy, I don’t know if you saw “George Carlin’s view on aging! If not, Hope you enjoy…Michael
    > George Carlin (Absolutely Brilliant)
    >> >
    >> >IF YOU DON’T READ THIS TO THE VERY END, YOU HAVE LOST A DAY IN YOUR
    >> LIFE.
    >> >AND WHEN YOU HAVE FINISHED, DO AS I AM DOING AND SEND IT ON.
    >> >
    >> >George Carlin’s Views on Aging
    >> >
    >> >Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old
    >> is
    >> >when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited
    >> about
    >> >aging that you think in fractions.
    >> >
    >> >”How old are you?” “I’m four and a half!” You’re never thirty-six and
    >> a
    >> >half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key.
    >> >
    >> >You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the
    >> next
    >> >number, or even a few ahead.
    >> >
    >> >”How old are you?” “I’m gonna be 16!” You could be 13, but hey, you’re
    >> >gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . . you become
    >> 21.
    >> >Even the words sound like a ceremony . . . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!
    >> >
    >> >But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound
    >> like
    >> >bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now,
    >> you’re
    >> >Just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed?
    >> >
    >> >You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the
    >> >brakes, it’s all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50
    >> >and your dreams are gone.
    >> >
    >> >But wait!!! You! MAKE it to 60. You didn’t think you would!
    >> >
    >> >So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.
    >> >
    >> >You’ve built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it’s a
    >> day-by-day
    >> >thing; you HIT Wednesday!
    >> >
    >> >You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT
    >> lunch; you
    >> >TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn’t end there. Into the 90s,
    >> you
    >> >start going backwards; “I Was JUST 92.”
    >> >
    >> >Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a
    >> little
    >> >kid again. “I’m 100 and a half!”
    >> >May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
    >> >
    >> >HOW TO STAY YOUNG
    >> >1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and
    >> height.
    >> >Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay “them ”
    >> >
    >> >2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
    >> >
    >> >3. Keep learning. Learn more about t he computer, crafts, gardening,
    >> >whatever. Never let the brain idle. “An idle mind is the devil’s
    >> workshop.”
    >> >And the devil’s name is Alzheimer’s.
    >> >
    >> >4. Enjoy the simple things.
    >> >
    >> >5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
    >> >
    >> >6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who
    >> is
    >> >with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
    >> >
    >> >7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it’s family,
    >> >pets,keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your
    >> >refuge.
    >> >
    >> >8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is
    >> >unstable,improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
    >> >
    >> >9. Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next
    >> >county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.
    >> >
    >> >*10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every
    >> opportunity.
    >> >* *I LOVE YOU….
    >> >*
    >> >
    >> >*AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
    >> >*Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the
    >> moments
    >> >that take our breath away.
    >> >
    >> >And if you don’t send this to at least 8 people – who cares? But do
    >> share
    >> >this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each day!!
    >> >
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >>
    >
    >

  11. YAY!!!!!! You posted your picture!
    Ok, so now I have a visual to go with your words and voice (from Tally’s blog…yay!) Love the red hair and the gorgeous smile, this picture does not show your age, you look great. (You are not old and you do not look old and you sure as heck do not act old!!!)
    I had a really hard time at 25, cried everytime someone said “Happy Birthday” and I so wanted to punch everyone when they kindly reminded me I was a quarter of a century old!
    30 was really bad too and since then every birthday is depressing for me, I am having a really hard time with getting older. Next month I will be 34, scares the heck outta me!
    I mentioned in a previous blog comment, “You are only as old as you feel” and it’s so great that you feel 26, these days I feel alot older which makes it even harder for me!
    But I am slowly coming to grips with the fact that I will not get any younger and that there is no fountain of youth…so I have to deal with it.
    My kids keep me young, but at the same time, age me and make me feel old and tired…lol
    Big Huggs, thanks for sharing your picture with us!

  12. Fuzzy, I am 38, and will be 39 in November.Please!!!!, say it aint so!!! It can’t be that bad to be 40!!!! When I am forty, I will have 4 outta five of the teens out in college (hopefully!) and Rob and I will only have his daughter who will be 16 by then left in the nest, so 42 is my new 18!!!! I don’t know if you read one of my blogs where I described how I met my teddy Bear, he is retired Navy of 20 years, has 3 teens ages 18,16,and 14, and he put hisself through college and is a history major, he’s going to teach U.S. History in high school. He has been raising his children alone for some years, ( like me ) and we both just so happened to join Eharmony at around the same time. We also both went on two or three other dates through there before meeting each other. One day when I got home and checked the new matches for the day, I looked at his and his pretty blue eyes were smiling at me!!! I was accustomed to waiting until the guys initiated a talk with me, which got mixed results, so I decided I liked what I saw too much to let this one be someone elses Teddy Bear, and I initiated talk with him!Long story a little less longer…LOL!…We are very evenly matched!!! It is true what they say about matching you on so many levels, just a bit scary finding the ONE, but well worth the effort!!! Let me know if you want to try it, I have some other fascinating info for you if you do!!!…and BTW, you are a very pretty woman, and I mean that with all sincerity!!! Don’t down yourself, you have skills and looks!!! which is more than those bubble headed 20 somethings!!!Hugggggs!!!!….the Spazzster!

  13. I actually have had a lot more fun since I turned 40. Granted, I don’t get drinks sent to me in bars anymore….and realistically, if I prowled the local clubs now the way I did in my 30s…I’d be one of those women I used to look at sadly…..the ones who dressed too young, wore too much makeup and whose faces screamed desperation. Sure there aren’t nearly the number of hot men falling all over us….but on the other hand, its rather refreshing to no longer have to sift through “is this person interested in me as a person or simply my ample cleavage or my great ass (the latter is, I’m afraid, wishful thinking on my part). Anyhow – I have given it a lot of thought, and as much as I wish I was in a relationship at the moment – the converse is that I probably would haven’t discovered who I am and what is important to me had I not had this time freed from the pressure of trying to accomodate/please/compromise with a life partner. So chin up, it will get better. Just keep in mind that many men feel the same way (much younger in their minds than their calendar age) and recognize that just as you don’t look 25 anymore….neither will they.

  14. LOL, Elmo, thank you, you are so fun and yay! you, too. 😀

    Well, Kerry, I’m sure it’s not gooey lovey glasses, but even if he feels that way, yay!! 😀 And start saving now for your anti-aging treatments. LOL

    Laurie, I just love your story and think that you are right about diamonds in the rough. Maybe I was a bit too hasty passing them by, but then again, I invested years in just plain roughs, so maybe it’s my judgement? Dunno. But I AM happy for you, Lucky Girl. And thanks so much for the “hot mama” thing, that made me laugh (really) out loud. 😀 Thanks for the awesome comments!

    okay, thanks, Michael E.

    LOL, Elmo, you are a nut! A nice nut to be sure! :))

    Well, Maggie, that’s not a good picture (obviously), but thanks. I took it in the bathroom with it’s horrible day glo lighting, the camera’s at arm’s length (so my face looks like big alien head), and I’ve got a big fake smile plastered on my face. Other than, though . . . lmao. I’m so bad at taking compliments, huh? Thanks. My hair’s a LOT longer than that and unstyled at the mo’ . . . need to have a me day pretty soon, that’ll go a long way to cheering me up!! 😀 Lucky you to be 34 . . . makes me want to go all Cher and want to turn back time. Sigh. But yeah, I think that having a such young kids will both age and keep you young. You’re just marvelous exactly as you are!! Huggs

    LOL, Spazzy, most days it doesn’t bother me at all, and really, it’s not as bad as all that (I go for a bit of hyperbole when snarkiness fails). But it’s not as fun as 38, I’ll tell you that. 😀 But then, you’ve got all your prizes, so you’ll like it better. I still need some prizes in my life, then I’ll be happy happy happy. Maybe it’s not AGE, it’s just prizes? Hmmmmm. I’ve seen the commercials for eHarmony and given it some serious thought; it’s really that good, huh? I’d LOVE to meet the ONE, you know? Yeah, you’ll definitely have to tell me more!! 😀 Yay! Thanks for the fab comments.

    Hey there, Em. Yeah, I can see where you’re coming from there with the age thing. I’ve not really been much in the way of accomodating and pleasing (um, maybe that’s a part of my problem?), but compromise always sounds good. Good luck out there in date space, can’t wait to hear more about your journey on your blog. Thanks so much for stopping by!

  15. ok, so what are you on about, fuzzy? you look gorgeous. you don’t look anywhere near 40, either.

    and i don’t know what kind of shampoo you’re using, but maybe you ought to think about buying yourself some more snacks if you’re resorting to munching on your hair. 😉 *hugs*

  16. aw, thanks so much, Kerry, but you have to say that because you’re my friend! And lol @ the buying more snacks thing (um, that’s why the double chins, Girl!) You make me laugh, yay! *hugs*

  17. As to aging, I can relate. LOL! I’m 38 and holding. Actually I don’t think about my age very often… although I did finally have to start getting my hair dyed to cover the grey. Amazingly enough though, even with the gray I usually still get carded. Go figure.

    By the way, you are super pretty! And I wouldn’t guess you for 40, at least from that picture. Maybe you should post one after missing some sleep. ROFL

    You know what? I saw that exact same comedian on Comedy Central last night… the kleenex lady. I fell asleep before the end of her set though.

    As far as being single? I’ve been married since I was 20… almost 18 years now. Actually, on the relative anonymity of your blog I’ll admit I’m pretty close to a divorce situation. Perhaps it’s a good thing to read about the trials and tribulations of singles. Maybe I should keep my kleenex? LOL

    Oh, and I must say, I like the way you put your blog in the table format like that. Looks pretty cool!!

    p.s. Sorry this is so rambling, it is 2:30 a.m. after all. Normally I’m at least a tad bit more coherent. *wink*

  18. I think you are beautiful FuzzyT….and forty IS fabulous…..youknow what you want, you know what you will put up with…ok so it IS a bit old and we certainly don’t turn heads like we used to….I was really disappointed for about 2 months when I turned 40 at Xmas last but since then I decided to run with the Life Begins at 40 and the other thing – women are in their sexual prime at around 40…and now I go off!!!! “go off” means – go hard or go home…or….party like there’s no tomorrow.
    Lots of Love my friend as always

  19. You are so welcome for the hot mama comment . . .and its so true you are looking like a fabulous 40 . . .you are not yet ready for cougar status so get back out there . . ohh trust me I went through my roughs and my omg what was I thinking he’s only 22 and has more in common with my sons. Giddy up girl =) ****This pep talk comes to you today by the letters u – g- o – t – i- t so flaunt it and the number one because if you don’t put U first sometimes no one else will =P

  20. Are you kidding? You are gorgeous and just a baby. I think your laugh lines make you look happy. I actually love to see how people’s faces age. Some age kind of grumpy and some happy. You look like you have been pretty happy the last 40 years.
    I have never been concerned about age. I didn’t even mind turning 50. I think it may be because I have some really good friends who are in their 60s & 70s. I also have some really good friends who are in their 20s & 30s. I think the older friends are so wise and helpful and the younger ones are fun and keep me young.
    Have you gotten less picky with age? I’m sure that there are some equally picky 40ish guys out there too.
    Did I tell you that you are gorgeous? :0)

  21. No sympathy from me.
    You are still a young squirt.

    Ever notice how people are most always prefaced by age here in the USA??
    It has become a numbers game. Listen to the news. See how many times age in years is mentioned….never mind maturity level or accomplishments or misdeeds or tragic events….it matters not one whit without magic numbers. Mostly this in only in regards to people, but it is also taking birth in stories about animals, buildings and places.

    We can laugh and joke about birthday numbers, but as Michael E pointed out…maybe we should take a page from George Carlin and forget about the numbers game and start living life.

    Oh my….I seem to have gotten carried away with my comment.

    Anyway I think you are a beautiful, mature lady who has an excellent head on her shoulders.**Huggs**

  22. You’re crazy…I don’t see any wrinkles. I think you look fabulous. Age is such a state of mind. I’m 43 now and don’t really feel any different than when I was 30. Okay…so my jeans are 2 sizes larger….but I’m happy. I don’t want to be 25 again, I like the experience I’ve accumulated. Embrace 40….its only a number. A beautiful, intellegent, witty, financially independent woman like you can’t find a man? I’m having a hard time believing that one…… (:

  23. I think it may have been me that said that, when I wrote a blog ‘in praise of the older woman'( by older, I mean over-35ish, not older than me LOL). You probably remember that one. And looking at the pic, I’d say you epitomise what I was saying. I’ve seen some of your ‘younger’ pics, and frankly I prefer you as you are now. Gorgeous.

  24. Well I think you look fab… and like Rivergirl I’m happier older (I’m 45) and like me more know than I was when young. OK I’m heavier and wrinkled.. and my knees are gone… I’ve got more self-esteem, a broader less selfish attitude, a whole bunch of friends who have ‘grown’ up with me and understand my quirky ways (now that is a life time of experience), my life experiences (the good and the bad) and I even like my ‘grey’ hair.

  25. well i wouldnt shy away from a beauty like you. Absolutely nothing wrong with that lovely smiley face from this side of the monitor, you look fabulous for forty. never knock yourself as plenty of jealous snipers will do that for you.

  26. well…not sure whether i agree with your rant against men..but i guess it does apply to some!
    I was thinking of ranting in the same vein as i just come back from a blind date with a woman our age, i’m 38 and i know you’re a young 40..well,everyone does now!
    Pretty stunning but dull as shit.Was more interested in what kinda lifetyle i could provide for her, how much i earned,what kinda car i drove (what?!!!!),had i been to this exclusive holiday or that and all other manners of superficial shit…etc etc.
    She really was blunt as that! I guess she had an agenda but just didnt ‘see me’.
    I told her i was planning to buy a VW Passat because its a family car and nice and reliable. You should have seen the disgust and shock on her over-painted face! lol
    Fzy, i do know what you mean but the difficulties of finding someone on the same wavelength appplies to both of us and not just to 40 year fabulous looking lecturers!
    and my glasses may need cleaning but heck i cant see any wrinkles on you!
    hugs
    Rash x

  27. You guys are all the greatest!! I should have blogged this angst ages ago; I feel so much better now. I’m just overwhelmed by your caring and sweetness as a whole. 😀

    Kelly, I think about my age toooo much lately (obviously), but I think that I’ll get over it. Well, I don’t know about your kleenex sitch, but I do know that the grass is most certainly not greener on this side of the fence! Oh, and thanks for the fab compliment about the blog table thingy; it’s actually a stationary thing I got from smiley.com. But anyone with any tech savvy tells me that’s the demonseed of evil sites and I need to uninstall it immediately. I want to, but . . . pretty! 😀 And your comment isn’t rambling at all! Thanks so much for it, as it made me smile!! Did you catch that comedian chick’s name? I suppose I should give her credit, but no idea who she is.

    Aw, huggs and big thanks for that, Tal. 😀 But really . . . YOU are. 😛

    Yay! Ali! That’s the ticket . . . just the pep talk I needed. Once I get myself sorted out, I’ll be back to upbeat happy Fuzzy, I’m sure. 😀 You make me smile. Huggs, friend!

    omg, roflmfao, Laurie!! You are the funniest thing!! I loooovvee this. Teehee

    OMG, that’s the best comment ever, Nancy! Thank you so much. And you’re right about age and friends, too. I have friends in their twenties, and my very best friend is 50 (so I can’t really “vent” my own stress to her because it obviously sounds silly, and I definitely don’t think she’s “old” or “past it” or whatever). You are totally FABULOUS at fifty, and I want to be like you. Yay! You guys are all convincing me that forty is fabulous after all. Wooohooo!! And thanks so much for the compliment, too! Sniffle. Huggs. 😀

    lolol, Rainy! Yay! I wanna be a young squirt. Ooooh, can I be a wippersnapper instead? LOL Like you’re a doddering old coot. Good heavens!! You’re fun and funny as heck. As to the age thing, I HAVE noticed that (it’s on my blog topic list, actually!). I think that’s one of the reasons we are so angsty in this country in particular about maintaining our youth, etc. What is up with that, I wonder? I think that’s excellent advice, too, to forget the numbers game and start living life. That should be a famous quote! Thanks for the wonderful compliment, too, that’s just amazing of you to say. *Big hug*

  28. Hehe, well, Rivergirl, when I wrote this, even I didn’t want to BE 25 again, I just wanted my body to be 25 again . . . the inside me can stay 40, I’m good with that. 😀 But honestly, you guys have all been a God send here, and I’m really starting to see that my personal hell is just silly! Forty IS just a number, and what’s the big? Of course I wish a few things were different in my life, but then, who doesn’t? And you are too funny . . . I’m not really looking for a man, but if I were, I imagine it wouldn’t be easy. Hehe. 😀

    Wow, Mitch, your comment made me blush! How sweet are you? Thanks so so much! 😀 Yay!

    Okay, Treesparrow, I have to ask, why the quotes on “grey” hair? It’s not really grey? You’ve dyed it? (I color mine . . . erm, obviously!). And you, too, have contributed to my rethinking this big dark mope thing about forty. And THAT is totally meaningful, so thank you so much! 😀

    And that’s all too true, Pilgrim, about the jealous snipers. And thank YOU so much, too, for the wonderful compliments. I’ll be all puffed up by the end of day and won’t fit my head through the door. Quite a turnaround from when I posted this in a dark icky funk. Yay you!! 😀

    And Rash! What a nightmare!! I’m sure you were polite (far more so than I would have managed), but it must have been the worst date ever. Yuck. And I know I was hard on single guys, and frankly, you aren’t like that, you have a lovely home, an education, a career, interests beyond drinking and sex, and are quite the catch! So my apologies to you if you thought I was lumping you in with the rejects. Never! And if we ever did meet, I think I’d have to insist that you never clean your glasses. LMAO. Thanks for the kind words. Huggs.

    Well, REALLY it’s hugs all ’round. You guys have really helped me with this issue, and I know it’s been made worse by my recent circumstance, and I know that I’ll “snap out of it,” but without you all offering your wonderful support and encouragement . . . well, who knows how long that might have taken. I’m all sniffly thinking of how kind you all are. Truly.

  29. Cool! I get to see what you look like! YAY! 🙂 And, you DON’T look 40. Then again, I am not sure what 40 looks like any more. I don’t think I look 40 either (except on those days with too little sleep too Hee Hee). As for the guys, you know, I had pretty much given up myself and in my 20’s I wouldn’t have thought twice about Mike (then again, he still had a motorcycle then so I might have). I am so glad now that I reduced my ‘list’ of acceptable to how a guy treats me, his friends and my friends and his family and my family. He’s all good! And, he was right under my nose for 2 years!!! (And, had a house he didn’t have to renovate and would have been big enough for the two of us, a motorcycle and a classic car. All of which he got rid of shortly after we met and over a year before we started dating…sigh). Anyway, be patient dear, your ‘Joe’ will show up when you least expect him to appear. 😀 Hugs!

  30. Fuzzy nice pic. Dam girl you do look good. I remember the day I turned 30. It was the worst day of my life. Hell, I was getting old. And then the next day I realized I felt no different than I did two days ago. Age is just a number. I am now 48, and still think of myself as young. And woman, wow, do they age gracefully. Women in their thirties, forties, and even fifties are way sexier to me than girls in their late teens and twenties. You make forty look fabulous!!!!!

  31. Hehe, LO, you should post a bigger pic o’ you, too; you look very cute, though in the one you’ve got up on your profile thing. I think it’s awesome that you’ve met the right guy now and that he may not have been right back in our twenties. I was definitely not looking for “the one” then (and actually lost just “the one” because of it!), and I guess now it’s easy to regret that instead of just adjust. You’re an inspiration! Yes, I’ll be patient. And I’ll grab some donuts to wait for Joe (wink). Hugs to you!!

    Aw, Michael, you are far too kind! Thanks for your marvelous compliments, and for the boost that I needed. You’re always the best friend and balancer, huh? Huggs.

  32. hmm Ive only just caught up here, I was away having my 40th birthday…ugh!! Now I know what there is to look forward too lol..cheers fuzzy :p ..I must of missed the pic but im sure you are lovely anyway…I was dreading reaching 40, it sounds so much older than 39 for a start…ive always dated younger guys but im sure they are not gonna want to date a 40 yr old now (gosh, it really does sound old)…im only 1 day into being 40 so I guess I will get used to it, doesn’t help that I let go of my 30’s with much alcohol yesterday.
    40’s here I come

  33. Crap, I missed the photo. Sigh. Grrrrr….hmph. Oh well, you’re a beauty who looks 23 in my eyes!!! I didn’t need to read your blog today. I’m not 40 yet, but I’m closing in. Turning 37 this year. I’ve never been nervous about an age before. For some reason, 40 scares me. It just sounds mature or something. I look around at some people that I know are 40 & I don’t want to be like that. I want to stay the way I am. Is that bad? Am I supposed to chop my hair off, stop wearing low waisted jeans, and put on sensible shoes?? Nope, not going to happen. But, then if I don’t…will I be one of those people that others point at and whisper “she should act her age”??

    The hole dating at 40 thing is scary too. No, I’m not dating material right now….but. Hahaha @ your descriptions though. Oh well, at least the dude had condoms…hahahah….did he have a spare in his wallet too???

    Last week I watched a new reality show. Stupid one actually, but the concept was interesting. 30ish dude….gets to pick his “mate” from 20-somethings and 40-somethings. I guess it was called Age of Love. Comes on again tonight. I must say….the 40something women looked darn good!!

    Okay….I’m taking my blah self elsewhere….to leave some equally annoyingly long comment on someone else’s blog :p

  34. Hee Hee Ang! Actually, my 40th birthday turned out to be one of the best ever…I got to celebrate for four days in a row. And, I have NOT stopped wearing low waisted or natural waist jeans, totally insensible shoes AND my hair is still long!! My plan when I hit 60ish is to let it all go gray, keep it long and wear whatever I DARN WELL PLEASE!

    Fuzzy – you need a BIG dog that eats EVERYTHING too! LOL! Hugs, you will find him, no worries. Don’t forget pizza joints too! LOL! When I find a pic of myself that I like enough, I will post it, I promise 😀

  35. Oh Shell! I didn’t even think of that, but as you can see from the comments, I was totally over reacting. I think that Rainy’s right, and that we are so focused on the NUMBER that we don’t even enjoy our LIFE. Not me, I don’t care about that number; besides, forty’s the new thirty, right? Huggs to you and happiest of birthdays!! 😀

    Ang, oh puh-lease! Like I’m going to go blue haired and wear polyester just because I turned 40!!! As if. I still wear low-waisted pants/jeans (I look like a sack of potatoes in anything else), and I still wear cute and sassy tops and shoes. I honestly don’t care if I’m not “dressing my age”; I mean I’m not wearing mini skirts and tube tops, and I’m certainly not putting plastic barrets in my hair. I think there’s a way to look like an adult and still be fashionable and stylish (and not look like you’re trying to be twenty!!). That show was on last night, I passed it on my way to Hell’s Kitchen. I can’t miss HK, so I gave the old vs. young date show a miss. BUT right after was a very very cool Science of Love show that I want to see again and again. And I want to go on it. Woohoo!!

    Yay, LO, love Bob the dog!! 😀

  36. Hahah…I watched Hell’s Kitchen….AND taped Age of Love! I’m all about Julia on HK….gooooo Waffle House chick! :p

  37. Hei Fuzz.

    SO very interesting topic as usual here in your pad. Shame that I missed the pic…

    I found becoming 40 absolutely so very liberating and really ‘found’ Riihele in a deeper and more profound way – see how many ways I can apply the root of the word in a single sentence; HEEH – in other words: I became ME.

    I know that it is totally different of being a mother, having been married for so long etc., for I have single girlfriends around the world for whom 30, 40 even have been a major crisis time. Big way. I see what they mean now looking at the life through their eyes. Tough. Factum est.

    Take care and keep well. Rii xx HUGZ

  38. Unfair, unfair, unfair! You wait til I’m away to post a pic. Huh! Now I have to continue fantasising. On the other hand . . . Look, Fuzzy, I think it was Maurice Chevalier who said ‘getting old isn’t so bad really, when you consider the alternative’. But he was talking about the 70s and 80s. There is a 40-something woman in Britain who had a baby a few months ago and today moved into No 10 Downing Street! When you look at it from my perspective, 40 was a fabulous time. I know I loved it anyway (partly because you could be 26 or 12 when you wanted and no one cared). I don’t know why I’m being so encouraging; I’m still mad about you popping up as soon as I turn my back for five minutes. Anyway I’ll let you know when I’m available. Neil Kleenex. 26ish. gsoh. Likes to mow grass in Suburbia.

  39. Omg, Ang, you’re so like me; I’ll watch one crap show and tape another, too!! Woohoo!! And yeah, Waffle House chick is cool. I just think that show’s hilarious.

    I think that’s a big part of it, Rii, what’s been “done” in life, you know? But I do see after posting this that 40 isn’t the end of the line, and I’m actually not as traumatized by it. Go blogger support network!! Huggs to you Diggy Rii xx

    Neil, okay, you win, I’ll repost that pic just for you. 😉 This comment is hilarious, too, btw, Neil Kleenex. It’s grand to have you back and in top form, as well.

  40. Hey yer im with Neil on this one didn’t get to see the picture. Bummer. I just know that you woudl have looked fab in it anyways as you normally do. You are great and have a fab personality as well so you have it all go so go get umm ok.

    I so agree that the grass isn’t always greener on the otherside but it never stops us wanting what we haven’t got though does it. Hope you are feeling better now as you have no reason to feel bad. Hugs to you and hte crew. x

  41. Yay I can see the picture its appeared and your hair looks fab and bouncy in it. You look so different with your hair down and no glasses on. You should be fighting them men off with that stick. x

  42. hehe, Snuggles, well, thank you so much. That’s one hell of a crap pic, but I thought it captured all my agey lines and wrinkles well. 😀 Huggs to you and Marm from me and mine xx

  43. Ohhhhhhh…I peeked back into this blog totally with the hopes that you had reposted it!!! Yayyyyyyyyy, I get a visual now!! You good-looking girl you!!! My role model for 40 now!!!! (hugs) …oh, but I won’t knaw on my hair :p

  44. Aw, Fuzzy, what were you hiding for?! I am so touched. Thank you. Sorry if I made you leave it there for too long; had to get a good long look!

  45. lol, Ang, it’s a silly pic, but thanks! Um, though, aren’t you like three years younger than me?? LMAO

    And photoshop, Neil? Don’t you think I’d make myself 20 and blonde and fabulous? nope, that’s the me of me. Sigh.

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